For years, I didn’t have to get used to sleeping alone, because I fell asleep with one child and woke up with the other, writes Lara Bazelon for The New York Times.

My co-sleeping arrangement with my kids has persisted in some form or another since their father and I split up, when my son was 4 and my daughter was 2.

It started both by accident and necessity: A few weeks after the separation, I became really sick. What began as a sinus infection took over the rest of my body. I ran a low-grade fever, was intermittently nauseated, and coughed until I doubled over gagging. Weeks went by and I made multiple visits to the doctor. Nothing improved.